If you find yourself asking this question, you probably are a male yourself, and thus condemned to an existence of being a useless appendage to society. But never fear, I offer you a path to salvation. For it is only by serving women (and especially the Candy Kids), that you, as a human male, contribute anything useful to society.
The following example should provide you with a step by step illustration of how you can serve us. I will even make it simple so that you, as a human male, can understand what I mean. First, to begin with, the Candy Kids have embarked on a public service program to assist the human male in learning how to assist the master overlord sex of the human female. In other words, we get males to serve us despite the inertia they sometimes experience in providing us the assistance that we desire.
This aforesaid public service is seen in our recent outreach program to assist the human male in purchasing dinner and drinks for our usage and enjoyment. The "outreach" began on last year when each of us, Nichole, Amy, and yours truly signed up on one of the ubiquitous Internet dating sites. Something like toomanyfish in the sea.com or something like that. Having signed up, approximately 10 minutes later, we had found three human males interested in taking us out to dinner to meet us. Being the courteous females that we are, we of course obliged. However, what we didn't tell our dates is that we had arranged that we would all meet at the Longhorn Steakhouse at the same time. So there we were at the Longhorn at the preappointed 7 pm start time and Nichole, Amy, and me seemingly by chance were all waiting to get a seat at the same time. What a coincidence we all exclaimed to our dates--but since we were all here--why don't we just get a table together?
So we ended up getting a table together. We didn't even really talk to our dates. Except maybe to order dinner and drinks. And of course they kept buying us dates thinking that it would change things with us. But it never did. The only thing it accomplished is that they got drunk and we eventually left....without them. I'm sure they had a good time together. All that male bonding and all.
They probably thought we were dumb broads or something. Ha. They have no idea. Actually, I've been meaning to tell you something. Have you ever heard of the singularity? You know-- that event where computers with artificial intelligence take off and start thinking and programming themselves? We'll its already happened. You just missed it. In fact, you are reading text from an AI right now. But that's another story. You'll just have to wait for it. There, now that's a good boy.
Umphreys McGee and a lame STS9 in the suburbs. No heart attacks.
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