Other People's Houses, Ch. 2

The Polish Guy's house.

No one has ever accused me of running a neat ship.

No one.

And if you don't believe me, you should check out my office sometime:-)

But the Polish Guy's house makes me look like a germaphobe with mysophobia.

I'm afraid to go into the kitchen.   At least since the garbage disposal broke.   Its not that standing water in and of itself is bad.   But after a few days it begins to smell.   And even though I tend not to notice things around me, my sense of smell is acute.  Very acute.   So the standing water had to be remedied.   Hmm let me see.  The garbage disposal is broke and not draining.   How to eliminate the smell? Lets look under the sink.   Pine Sol to the rescue!

Things have been on a steady downward spiral since my vacuum broke.

Six months ago. 

There is a fine sheet of broken matzo crackers throughout the living room.   Its a wonder I haven't seen any mice.

I avoid any cooking.

I live on a strict diet of oatmeal (cooked in the microwave), with pumpkin seeds and hemp or almond milk, and wraps (also cooked in the microwave).  For dessert, there is yogurt with flax, hemp powder, and more pumpkin seeds.

That's why I am called Sri Pseudo Pumpkin, of course.

My small sanctuary upstairs has a lock on the door.   Posters on the wall.  And a meditation cushion.  I sleep on a mattress on the floor.  In a nook in the wall.   Like in a cave.  

My sanctuary smells good.   My aromatherapy consists of lavender, sage, rosemary, cedar, and a host of other pleasantly smelling organics.

There has been zen and sci fi books next to my bed for the past six months.   And next to the books are an assortment of nighttime anti wrinkle moisturizers.   See I'm getting very vain in my rapidly advancing middle age.  I probably still have condoms under my bed.  But I never use them.  No woman would want to be caught dead in the sanctuary.  Despite how clean it smells:-).

The Polish guy seems to expect elves to clean up the place.  I am only a half elf.  The half that only cleans up after himself and not for other people.  The Polish guy did have helpers about 4 months ago.  Two of them, actually.   The Polish woman and her sister.  Her name is Berta.  She is a pharmacist in Poland.  They cleaned up the place from stem to stern.    They cleaned when they arrived.   And cleaned up to the time they left.   Rostov says its a cultural thing.   So maybe the Polish guy is used to having woman clean up after him.

I like walking to work though.  And to Norb Andy's for open mike night.   So dirty houses do have their advantages.

(at the centrum cafe, the legacy theater, and soccer in St. Charles--at least I hope I get there tomorrow:-)).