Kimchi Devinations

And it came to pass in the city of St. Louis that a vast congregation swarmed the downtown area all unified in their admiration of a certain woman named Joyce.  This Joyce advocated ordinary answers to ordinary questions.  Indeed, the last name of the Joyce was at once commonplace as it was ordinary:  Meyer.   But the swarm wanted more--much more.  They sought the banishment of a lifetime of banality in a single convention weekend.  In their haste to suck the marrow out of life, the swarm clogged the eating establishments and dance halls when the Joyce was not in session.  For the swarm came to know, at a deep guttural level, that what they wanted were not the words of another woman.

So we endeavored to assist them in their little endeavor.  We set up the shrines in our hotel rooms, and specifically on our bed so that we could assist the Joyce devotees in their prayers.  Together.  And assist them we did.  We retained Roland Johnson to assist us.  And the Roland was more than willing. Though we purchased separate rooms for him.  Our rooms had the Bob Marley on the wall.  Roland's had the James Brown.  And we became extremely exhausted in our efforts of assistance.  And no more tadpoles were present in our system, long since were they drained in our efforts.  So we decided to take the 36 hour respite.  And we wore the jeans they wore, because they were warmer.  

In our exhaustion, an idea came to us that had long been fermenting in our consciousness.   For it is only in fermentation that our ideas can become fully fomented and frothing.   So on the second day of our labors, we sent out on a quest to locate that elusive substance that could provide the sustenance to the Joyce devotees where we could not.

Our quest was conducted utilizing the latest algorithms.  We read the church newsletters.  And we read the church flyers.   And on the third day we came to knock on the doors of many Churches that had advertised the pot luck.  Especially in the areas of town near Olive Street known for its bubble tea, Korean bakeries, and fast food establishments that looked like this:

And we prostrated ourselves in front of our new Messiahs.  We asked forgiveness because we only came to eat at the church pot luck.  For lo, we did not bring any food.  We did bring the wine, three cases of it which had previously been delivered to us at the Carsonhurst in circumvention of the laws of Illinois.  And we all drank the wine, listened to the funk, and ate the fermented Kim-chi to our hearts content.   And for the first time in their lives, the devotees of the Joyce smiled:-).