More Fun in Automobiles

 I was with some dark haired woman.  I was not sure if I worked with her or it was some sort of encounter.  It was not someone I knew.  It first was casual.  Then for some reason we had to get closer.  I'm not sure who came up with that idea.  I'm not sure who moved forward first.  She ended up wrapping her legs around my hips as we were sitting down.  That was the only posture between us that worked for some reason.  Something was covering my legs, but like a blanket, but underneath I didn't have anything on.  She was shocked by this.  But her hand was exploring my anatomy under the blanket.  Then I realized that we were in the backseat of a car.  The car was moving.  I asked her "who is driving."  Then we realized that no one was driving.  

From the backseat I tried to stop to the car.  But it didn't slow down.  We were on a road going to a town.  Some small town I had been in, something like Danville, or Litchfield

.  We went through a parking lot to some store, but still it didn't slow down.  The car then went through multiple walls.  I kept bracing for impact but there was no collision.  Then I woke up.  

Stuck in the Middle With You and You and You

 We live in so many interwoven dreams, and at night we can access them, our ego releasing its grip, showing us that we live in many different worlds, many different beings, and many different stories and modes of existence don't make any sense to this dream when we return.

And all of those beings are us, in ways that we cannot understand, and I cannot accept, or at least choose not too. But like it or not, that is reality.  And in some way that I cannot accept yet, the truth of it is so much better than what I am comfortable with.  For I live in this meat sack that thinks, or at least think that  I think, that I am separate from everything.  That I was born and that I will die.  What happens after death is the great unknown.

This way of thinking is my familiar life, my familiar world, my familiar family.  And I feel that when I descend it to what I really am, what this is really all about, I feel that my familiar world, familiar life and familiar family are being taken away from me, and I retreat, and I want to stay here and reject what I really am, stuck in the middle with you.

But when I come back from the dream, or the 5-HT2A receptor agonists stop being agonists, I want to return to the awareness of what I am.  This is another manifestation of the indecision that repeats in my medicine adventures or waking space.  Interesting.