The Earth Has Two Moons

The Earth has two moons.

And I have two minds.  The one mind which I think is real, has no substance.   The other mind which I cannot experience is more real that I can imagine.

Many moons ago, when humans looked up in the sky they could see two moons.  One moon was a ball of fire that provided light and heat and interfered with your eyes if you stared at it too long.  When that moon went away, another moon appeared, white, cold and dark.

The ball of fire was worshiped as no other god, concept or religious deity has ever been worshiped before or since.  Its benefits were immediate and tangible.  Its adherents could feel its glory directly warming their skin and souls.  It ceaselessly bestowed life upon the world with reservation.  Its glory was shared equally by all:   rich, poor, believers and non-believers alike.  This moon became the center of the universe, of all that was good on the Earth.

The other moon which appeared in the sky in what became known as night was shrouded in mystery.  It was to be feared.   For in the night, death came swiftly and brutally to the unprepared.

Then the sun god was dethroned by the clever humans.  The sun became just one of many natural events controlled by well defined scientific principles.  The sun no longer was the center of the universe,  denigrated to just one of a countless number of suns in the universe.  And so it goes.

But what does all this have to do with my mind?  The mind which I think is real is worshiped almost as intensely as the original Sun God.  I believe that it gives me everything I can know or perceive in the world around me.  How else can I perceive anything but for the access it provides me? 

But then the mind god was dethroned by the clever humans.   The mind is no longer the center of all that is known or can be known.  Instead, it resides in you and you and you.  Rock, Paper, Scissors.

The advantages of being a wall flower.   If only high school in wyoming were that cool, but I least I know all the music.  The dude from Iowa does not work out for the bird watcher.   Hopefully my sister will get the new job.  By the way, vintage port is kinda cool.....

Why My Penis Does Not Hurt When I Urinate

The fact that my penis does not hurt when I urinate is surely a function of good penis hygiene.

That, and only inserting it into specially approved and certified receptacles.

The certification process to become a specially approved receptacle is quite rigorous.

To begin with, the receptacle applicant must submit all applications in triplicate.  Now I know that a lot of penis' out there will accept applications in duplicate.   But experience has taught me that only two applications can lead to what is known as "double trouble."

The expression "double trouble" originated from the band of the same name associated with rock/blues guitar virtuoso Stevie Ray Vaughn in the late 1970s and early 1980s.  I want you to focus a moment on the name "Steve."  There are a plethora of rock musicians named Steve.   Think about it:   Steve Tyler of Aerosmith,  Steve Miller, Steve Winwood, Steve Wonder, Steve Perry (Journey), Steve Gaines (Lynyrd Skynyard), Steve Nicks, Steve Stills, Cat Stevens, Steve Adler (Guns and Roses), Shaking Stevens, Steve Mariott (Humble Pie), Sufjan Stevens, Little Stevens, Stephen Cochran, Steve Albini, Steven Tasker, Steven Morris (Joy Division), Steven Howe (Yes), and the list goes on and on and on.   So what does all this have to do with the hygiene of my penis?

Its very simple.  We all know that rock and roll is the instrument of the Devil.   Further, the name "Steve" is also a conjugation of the words "St." and "Eve".   In other words, "Steve" literally implies the belief that the Genesis figure of "Eve" was a Saint.   To carry this one step further, we all know from our biblical interpretation that Eve was the first protagonist of the Bible that made a deal with the Devil. As such, Eve can be considered in a conspiracy with the Devil to deprive "man" of good penis hygiene. Therefore, to avoid "Steve" and all forms of "double trouble" you must insist that all receptacles submit their application in triplicate.  The triplicate is analogous to the holy trinity of the father, the son, and the holy spirit.  That trio can extinguish any known penis infiltrate or sexually transmitted disease without difficultly.   Otherwise, you will be inserting you penis, literally and figuratively, into the Devil, which is not recommended.    

I get back from Colorado.  The whirles travel to London.  I learn to breath in the Decatur Library under a certain degree of adversity.  More things happen that I don't quite remember as I just returned from the Friedman's party listening to Brooke Thomas and the Blue Sons.  Average, but for the appearance of Don Julio.